When I have a problem, the first responder thoughts in my mind are not helpful ones. No. They start rattling off the worst case scenarios immediately.

Like a couple of days ago. I woke up at 6 AM, got out of bed, and wondered why it was so cold in my house. I looked at the thermostat. It was 62 degrees. Oh, no! The furnace was off. Again! I’ve had the furnace fixers here five or six times over the past couple of months. Ever since I had the big, old oil tank dug out of my yard and a new oil tank put into my house, I have had problem after problem. I don’t know if these two things are related.

I stood in the hallway shivering. The first responders in my head hissed, “This is the last straw! You’re going to have to buy a new furnace! You can’t go away this winter like you planned! What if the furnace goes off, and the pipes burst?! This problem won’t be fixable. You’re going to have to sell the house!”

Trembling with cold and fear, I called the emergency service, dressed in fleece, and made a hot cuppa tea.

After a few sips, the more helpful second responders showed up. They said soothingly, “Katherine. Wait til the furnace guy gets here and see what he has to say.”

By the time the repairman came, I was able to answer the door like a sane, calm home owner. I showed him the furnace room where the metal, fire-breathing dragon lives. He pressed a button. The dragon stirred to life and started breathing hot air.

“What happened?” I asked.

“I don’t know,” he said, “I’m guessing it’s the (whatchamacallit). I’ll replace it and see if that works.”

He’s guessing? I was about to get upset when he continued, “But here’s the good news:  the part I’m replacing is under your service contract. It’s an upgraded version. Your old part looks like something from the early 90’s or maybe even the 80’s. The new version has a brain in it, so if the furnace goes off again, it will tell me what the problem is and how to fix it.”

A brain?!!! I thought. My big, old, dragon now has a brain?! Amazing. The nice man left. I danced around my house singing, to the Scarecrow’s tune from Wizard of Oz, “La la la la la la la. Now my dragon has a brain.”

Three days later. I wake up. The house is cold. I look at the thermostat. Uh huh. The furnace is off. Yet, again. But, I’m on to those First Responders. “Hush up,” I say. “It’s going to be fine. If I have to get a new furnace, I will. The Big Whatever is looking after me. It’s a whole month until I leave for Florida.  It will be fixed. The furnace has a brain and will tell the nice man what went wrong.”

I don’t go right to the phone to call the emergency service. I wait for business hours because there is no emergency, really. At 9 AM I call the number I now know by heart. I drink my third cuppa hot tea. The knight in the shining truck comes. He opens up the dragon and starts tinkering with it.

I ask him the dreaded question. “Ummmm.  Do I need a new furnace?”

“Oh, no!”  he says. “This one is top of the line! It has a lifetime guarantee. If it can’t be fixed, they’ll replace the whole thing.”

Wow. I had no idea. That is such good news! I drink my tea and smile as he replaces the motor and fixes the Z Dimension, whatever that is, because the dragon’s brain told him it was an ignition problem.

Now, here’s the thing. You may not believe this, but I have noticed during the passing of my many years on this planet that when I can ignore my nasty First Responder thoughts, when I can release my fear, and give the problem to The Big Whatever, somehow, amazingly, the problem shifts in the real, material world to something much more benign, manageable, and even good.

I know that sounds like “magical thinking” but I have seen this pattern in my life many times. It may not be easy to do, but whenever you have scary, ole First Responder Thoughts in your head, see if you can turn them into the reassuring heroes they’re supposed to be.

And let me know how it works out.

We’re all so caught up running around the CatchUpKeepUpGetAheadeFallBackCatchUp wheel of work and life.  We face so many problems in relationships, health, and money from annoying and irritating to deeply grave.  And we deal with them somehow, God Bless Us One and All.

So, with all that.  We need to take our joy pills.  It’s the vitamin we need to give us the energy to do the other stuff.

Of course, a great vacation is like taking a whole regimen of joy vitamins, but what about the little joys that one can take in a day.  Unusual joys.

For me, a joy pill is sitting on a bench at the river in Westport watching the sunset as the Canada geese, ducks, and swans converge to exchange news of their day’s events.

Or, taking a drive by myself to the elegant Mayflower Inn in Washington, CT, ordering the $17 soup (because a whole meal there would put a huge dent in my fun budget) and then, taking a walk in their beautiful, formal Shakespearean garden.

Or, playing bridge with friends on a Sunday night.

Or, meeting someone for breakfast.

Or spending a long time watching a spider in her miraculously constructed, nearly invisible web, as she waits for dinner to come to her.

Or getting out my kayak and paddling around the Saugatuck river until the peachy full moon comes up, as I did last night.

Joy pills are very individual. I have a dear friend who takes trapeze lessons.  It gives her a kind of joy that lasts for days.  For me, that would be like taking a terror pill.

What’s your joy pill?  Share it.  Maybe it will inspire me and my readers.  We can always use a little more joy.

Some projects look like mountains to climb.  They are overwhelming: Taxes.  Writing the Novel.  Paying Bills.  Hammering out a Business Plan.  Buying Christmas Presents.  Cleaning out the House, the Garage, the Closet.  Reorganizing the Office.  Mailing out Inquiry Letters.

A nap looks like the only solution.

Some of these mountainous projects have deadlines.  They get done—maybe with resistance and complaining, but they get done.

The ones that have no deadline are the hardest to tackle.  They can become invisible in my mind and disappear behind the clouds of other activities.  Then, one day, the out of the haze, the mountainous task takes shape again, and I can’t ignore it any more.

Starting these projects is the hardest part, I find, but breaking it down to bite size actions helps me.  Someone once asked Stephen King how he could write so many books, “One word at a time,” was his quick response.  So, I am learning that when it is an overwhelming project to chunk it way down to edible bits.

I can do almost anything for 15 minutes at a time, so I set a timer and, say, go into my office to tackle the paper tiger snarling on my desk.  After 15 minutes, most times I just keep going, but by setting the timer, I can get myself started.  For me, starting is the hardest part.

That’s my 15 minute solution.  Hope it helps.  There goes the timer.

Sunday and Sunday, July 14 and 21
12:30 PM to 5:30 PM in Wilton, CT

“I was in a production of Urban Blight at the Manhattan Theatre Club in New York City with E. Katherine Kerr.  I watched her, riveted, in the wings every night in one of the most powerful moments I had ever seen onstage yet it was never the quite the same.  I enrolled in her powerful Creative Explosion Workshop.  My career and my life have never been the same.  The Four Principles are life altering.”
—-Faith Prince, Tony Award Winning Actress

“E. Katherine Kerr is a brilliant actress.  It is very rare to find a great teacher of acting who both has the gift and the craft to be able to pass it on.”
—-Mike Nichols, Emmy, Grammy, Multi Award Winning Director

You do not have to be a performer to do this workshop!  

The Purpose of the Workshop is to create the energy to start what you haven’t started and blast through the block that is in the way of going where you want to go.  In this powerful, easy, and fun workshop you will learn about and apply the four principles of brilliant acting to brilliant living.
1.    Commitment.  Become clearer about your own authentic commitments.
2.    Being Present.   Learn a simple and fascinating technique to help you be in your body and access amazing creativity, healing and wisdom.
3.    Relaxation.  Do a simple exercise to release fear and negative judgment.
4.    Communication.  Upgrade your understanding and application of communication.

What Happens When You Enroll in the Workshop. The moment you register the process begins. You may have:
1.    IMMEDIATE BREAKTHROUGH.  And find yourself starting to move forward in an area in which you have been stuck.  Miracles may occur between the time you register and the time you arrive at the workshop.
2.    RESISTANCE AND/OR FEAR.  The very act of commitment may bring up all the unexperienced feelings that have been in the way of your commitment.  Things may seem to you to “get worse.”  Negative thoughts and judgments may become more prevalent.  This is fine.  Bring them with you to the workshop.
3.    INTEREST/OPENNESS.  You may be ready for something new and not quite know what it is.  This is a very powerful position.  The workshop may hold many surprises for you.

What Happens in the Workshop.  The first day will be instruction, sharing, exercises, and time to record your experience.  Bring a notebook—preferably a large, three ring.  Wear comfortable, layered clothing (you will feel hot or cold depending on your own emotional temperature.)  Bring a snack or two.  If you have any medical problems that need attention please let me know what they are. On the first day you also will learn a technique that can change your life.  It’s called Getting Present.
On the second day of the workshop, using what you have learned, you will present a monologue, song, poem, short story, anecdote, or speech or a combination.  Four or five minutes is the preferred length, but it (or they) should be no shorter than one minute and no more than 10.   If at all possible, memorize or extemporize rather than read from a paper or note cards.
While the workshop is experiential, there is no pressure.  We write, share, and laugh a lot.  People leave feeling clearer, energized, and sometimes utterly transformed.  Committing to the workshop begins the process.

Fee Schedule: (Check or Paypal)
First time participant: $250
Repeating participant: $150
Questions? Call 203 563 0363

Imagine your car is your body and negative thoughts have dirtied up the windows so much you can’t see where you’re going or read the signs that will help you find your way.  Ever felt like that?

Time to take your body to the FEAR CAR WASH!

Instead of driving around blindly, stop and go in. Go inside.  A sign tells you to put your car in neutral and not to put your foot on the brake as you go through the fear.  You’ll hurt your car if you don’t.

So, you put your car in neutral, take your foot off the brake pedal, let go of trying to control life, and feel yourself being pulled into the fear.  All you have to do is sit there and ride it out as the sensations wash over you.

Your heart is pounding as it starts.  It’s intense!  Whoosh!  Whoosh!  Lots of water.  Tears flow.  Then.  Whap! Whap!  Suds and things slap at you.  Suddenly you see shadows of big shapes coming at you.  Oh, no!  Thump! Thump!  Your heart beats fast as noisy, big brushes roll over you.  You feel weird sensations all over your car/body.  They keep coming and changing.  Red lights flash!  Your heart pounds.  Water again.  You begin to see more clearly, but another big thing comes right at you roaring and blowing air.  Thunderous sounds surround you as you breathe and gasp air.  And then you see light ahead.  A green light turns on and another sign says to put your car/body in drive, put your foot on the gas and go forward.  You do, and before you know it, you’re through the fear!

Out in the sun again, washed clean.  Angels appear and dry you off—making you all shiny and new, and off you go seeing your path much more clearly.

Wouldn’t it be great if you could understand your fear as just a car wash?  That if you don’t jump out of the car or put on your brake or try to speed through it, but just ride it out, you will be cleansed of your fear.

Of course, if you’re really enlightened, you could take your car/body to an upgraded car wash where you can simply witness it going through the fear wash, but that’s really advanced.  Anyone out there that enlightened, please contact me.  I want to follow you to YOUR car wash.